The day of my birth...

Well, I am now officially 18 years old. Weird! I feel so old, so "grown up". I hate it! Just kidding, though, actually I just don't like it. (Hate is too strong a word) I have now spent my first birthday at college and my first day of classes here. A weird combo no? Needless to say, I was not very happy about having to do school on MY birthday. It has been a strange day actually, it does not feel like a birthday AT ALL. My family isn't here, my friends from home aren't here, and I didn't get to eat birthday cake! ;D Bummer, I know.
It's weird, I actually forgot today was my birthday! You see, at lunch, I saw some pretty tempting brownies as dessert. I did not allow myself one, thinking only of the numerous calories they contained. If I had realized TODAY was my birthday I would definitely taken one! (and consequently gained 10lbs for the sake of Murphy's Law)
It hasn't been too bad of a day though. My RA gave me some flowers! They're very pretty and are on my desk. My Mom, Danielle, and Skylar left me cards and a present, which was thoughtful of them. I also got many "Happy Birthday"s.
I'm just INCREDIBLY homesick and wish I were home having a true birthday party. :(
So, anyone wanna bake me a cake? :P

Give me Lord a servant's heart

"For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many."

-Mark 10:45

Jesus came to be a servant. Think about that, the Lord, God in human flesh, came to serve the lowliest of low. It blows my mind.

We don't expect a king to be doing a servant's job. We would never tell a king he should be washing floors or putting away dishes. But Christ, the King of all Kings, came to be a servant to all. He didn't come to be treated as royalty but came to save those that could not save themselves.

Remember John 13? Where Jesus washes His disciples feet? That is the example we should follow. We should be like Christ and present ourselves as a servant and helper.

John 13:1-17

Jesus Washes the Disciples’ Feet

1Now before the Feast of the Passover, when Jesus knew that his hour had come to depart out of this world to the Father, having loved his own who were in the world, he loved them to the end. 2During supper, when the devil had already put it into the heart of Judas Iscariot, Simon’s son, to betray him, 3Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going back to God, 4rose from supper. He laid aside his outer garments, and taking a towel, tied it around his waist. 5Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him. 6He came to Simon Peter, who said to him, "Lord, do you wash my feet?" 7 Jesus answered him, "What I am doing you do not understand now, but afterward you will understand." 8 Peter said to him, "You shall never wash my feet." Jesus answered him, "If I do not wash you, you have no share with me." 9Simon Peter said to him, "Lord, not my feet only but also my hands and my head!" 10Jesus said to him, "The one who has bathed does not need to wash, except for his feet, but is completely clean. And you are clean, but not every one of you." 11 For he knew who was to betray him; that was why he said, "Not all of you are clean."

12When he had washed their feet and put on his outer garments and resumed his place, he said to them, "Do you understand what I have done to you? 13 You call me Teacher and Lord, and you are right, for so I am. 14If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you also ought to wash one another’s feet. 15For I have given you an example, that you also should do just as I have done to you. 16Truly, truly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. 17If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tcQkYW1tEUw  - Servant's Heart- Ron Hamilton

La, la, la, la, la......

Recently I sang a solo at my church. I did "Feel the Nails" by Ray Boltz. It's a gorgeous song and the words are profound. Afterwards people came up and told me what a good job I had done etc... It's always weird for me when this happens. I don't know exactly how to say this, but, I don't feel like I did anything. Yes, I sang technically, but singing is different than other talents because a lot of it is what you're born with. I never asked God for a good voice. For some reason He saw fit to bless me with one. I have tried to use it best I can. This is why I don't know what to say when people praise me. I want to tell them that it's not me...it's God.

I'm Just Passing Through

I'm having one of those days where I wish I could already be in heaven. Don't get me wrong or anything. I just feel like saying: "God, can't you come back now?" I don't know about you, but, I must say I hate living in this world. As the old song goes"This world is not my home". I yearn for heaven, a place with no more sin and pain. I yearn for family and friends who are already there. But most of all, I yearn to be with God. He is so powerful and all-knowing, it boggles my mind.
The one good thing is...
I CAN have a relationship with Him here and now. In fact God wants to have a personal relationship with me. It's why He sent Christ to die. Everytime I feel down, I remind myself of this:
God loved me so much that He gave His only SON to die a horrible death so that I could go to heaven.
It's so incredible and awesome!
Think about it for a minute...
Imagine you have a son...
You love your son very much
He is special because he is your ONLY son
Then imagine giving him up to be born a man, knowing that to do so he would die on a cross like a common thief
He would die that way after doing nothing wrong...EVER
Not only that but he would die for the ones who killed him and all those who had done wrong
Can you imagine wanting to die to save the lives of those who were killing and inflicting pain upon you?
I can't even comprehend it.
The verse below, you most likely know. It's simple and to the point but so PROFOUND.
John 3:16-
"For God so loved the world that He gave his only begotten son that whosoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life."

If only...

I wanted to continue writing about contentment. So many times we look back and think "If only I had done this...or If only I had said that..." It all goes back to being content. When we think about the if onlys we wish we could do over a situation and aren't happy with our past. Hind sight is 20/20 as they say. It's so easy to be angry and frustrated over the past. Maybe someone wronged you or you were hurt. You have a different "if only". "You think: "If only I had stood up for myself or been stronger then it wouldn't have happened". Part of being content is realizing you need to let go of the past. You can't let the past control you instead you need to give it up to God. God is the controller of time and He knows all that has happened and all that ever will happen. If you have done something you regret I urge you to confess it to God. He's always there for you. The Bible says:
"If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9)
"He will again have compassion on us, and will subdue our iniquities. You will cast all our sins into the depths of the sea." (Micah 7:19)

Matthew West; a contemporary Christian artist has a song called History. The words are profound.
Listen:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AB6frYh4uBA

Here's the words:
Its been a bad day, you've been looking back
And all you can see is everything you wish you could take back
All your mistakes, a world of regrets
All of those moments you would rather forget
I know it's hard to believe
Let me refresh your memory

Chorus:
Yesterday is history
And history is miles away
So leave it all behind you
Let it always remind you of the day
The day that love made history

You know you can't stay right where you fell
The hardest part is forgiving yourself
But let's take a walk into today
And don't let your past get in the way

Would you believe that you are history
In the making, in the making
Every choice that you are making
Every step that you are taking
Every chain that you are breaking
History is in the making
Every word that you are saying
Every prayer that you are praying
Every chain that you are breaking
History is in the making
History is in the making
History is in the making

Here's another song by Audio Adrenaline:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0kencSLXLxU

Words:
The mistakes I've made
That caused pain
I could have done without
All my selfish thought
All my pride
The things I hide
You have forgot about
They're all behind you
They'll never find you
They're on the ocean floor
Your sins are forgotten
They're on the bottom
Of the ocean floor
My misdeeds
All my greed
All the things that haunt me now
They're not a pretty sight to see
But they're wiped away
By a mighty, mighty wave
A mighty, mighty wave
Your sins are erased
And they are no more
They're out on the ocean floor
Take them away
To return no more
Take them away
To the ocean floor


Give your past up to God.

Have you hugged your Mom today?

Mother's Day; a time for memories to come up and new ones to be made. A day we take aside and thank mothers, grandmothers, and aunts for all that they do. I have been extremely blessed with a big family with wonderful women in it. I love Mother's Day in that I can show my Mom how much I appreciate her as well as my Grandmothers. This year it's a little bittersweet though as it always is for those who have lost those they love. All of my great grandmothers have passed, one just last year. I loved them all dearly but I really only knew two well. My Gram and my Nana were women who have helped make me the person I am today.
My Gram was one of the sweetest person I knew. She was always gentle and never spoke harshly. She showed me how to love unconditionally and to hold each day precious.
My Nana was a cultured woman. She had lived in New York City and worked at the United Nations. She was the fun one and always made me laugh. She showed me to never take myself too seriously and that laughing is good for the soul.
I don't know what I'd do without my Mother. She is someone who works very hard even though she is sick. I am so grateful for her as I am my grandmothers.
I want to remind you to show YOUR appreciation for your mothers, grandmothers, and aunts not just on Mother's Day but everyday. Don't wait, you never know what will happen. A life can be gone in just a moment but encouragement lasts a lifetime.

Be content

Philippians 4:11b: For I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.

For a long time I had a problem with the verse. I felt maybe it wasn't applicable to me; no one else was going through the very hard stuff I was. I thought maybe when I have more money or nicer things, THEN I'll be content. But I realize now that I was so wrong. Paul says"in whatever state I am" that means rich or poor, sick or healthy, we are to be content. God never promised us life would be easy once were saved but He DID promise He will ALWAYS be with us.